It's Time To Start The Show..

One day left of what will be one of my most memorable years yet. So many amazing times, and not so amazing. All of which have taught me so much about myself, and the people I have in my life. Packing up my life and moving to a city that can eat you alive if you're not careful, was the best decision I have ever made. I couldn't imagine ringing in 2013 anywhere else.

I am so grateful for everyone who supported and encouraged me to follow my dreams! It means the world to me. I am thankful for the people I have in my life old and new. I love you all. 2013 will be amazing for all of us, I can feel it. Anything could happen. Lets pop 'em.

Lost in Translation

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Still in the dark, but in the dark together.

It’s finally here
The weather is getting colder
But my head it stays in place
Resting nicely on your shoulder
A place of peace and security
Safely in your arms
That’s where I’ll stay
At least until May
When the sun arrives for good
The seasons will always change
But I hope we don’t
Grow yes but change no
Being sad is a distant memory
Seems like it’s forever ago
I’m scared and I know you are too
Unsure if we’re ready but unwilling to let go
I’m here for you as you are me
Accepting each other flaws and all
Darkness and light
Embrace you and your fear
Just know that whatever it is Im here
I won’t judge because I care
I know something inside you is broken
I can see the tear
Lets close it together
Stitch by stitch
Kiss by kiss
Tear by tear
We’ll seal it forever

Feeling dark.

She said she'd rather be a bag lady.

"A woman's mind is as complex as the contents of her handbag; even when you get to the bottom of it, there is ALWAYS something at the bottom to surprise you."

Thrill Of The Fight.

One Week.Smoke Free.Don't.Fucking.Bother.Me.

Fall finally.
New York fall.
Cold beautiful greys and browns.
Layers and layers.
Cashmere on Lace.
Wellies and socks.
Chelsea hunters, for the Chelsea lovers.
Out with the denim shorts, in with the baggy boyfriends.
Out with the summer fling, in with the winter cling.
Cling as in cuddle.
Someone to carry you over the puddle.
Or through it in your Chelsea wellies.
Baileys and coffee in the morning.
Warm your bellies.
Out with summer in with winter.
Forever a head spinner.
Never been thinner.

Hometown Glory.

Canadian Tux.

I gave thanks yesterday.
Thankful for all that is and all that was.
All that will soon be, mostly.
 Before I was waiting, anticipating.
I let go.
And then I was let back in.
Back into you, around you, beside you.
No longer behind you.
No longer in your shadow.
You are only in my light.
Left the only darkness I knew.
Back there.
Over there.
4,000 km's over there.
Don't stare.
I won't blink, I've played this game too many times.
Close my eyes and your gone forever.
Take a step back, Step back together.

Excuse me a second I, I need to get my story straight.

It's that moment during the morning after the night before, when anxiety sets in.
I laugh out loud in a desperate attempt to reassure myself that everything is fine.
That there is no way I embarrassed myself last night.
Then my cell phone beeps, the ever nauseating Tri-Tone.

Sure enough my drunken, idle hands were up to no good.
Knowing my sober self all too well, drunk me deleted the evidence before morning.
All that was to be seen was the confused responses that were returned to me.

Good, perfect, I'm sure I was coherent.
3am texts are totally normal.
I wasn't drunk I was just playing scrabble through texts, obviously.

My mind wanders, yep I for sure texted him.
Probably regarding the "heated" conversation I was having about New York men, whilst sipping my third Jack and Ginger.
Screw it, delete.
Shit.
Serious move, I must mean business.
Immediately I regret the decision.
No longer in my contacts, I can only wait.
And wait.

Now.

Above all else keep moving forward.
Don't be stagnant.
Don't allow your hands to be idle.
When your still, the thoughts flow.
So be still, just don't stand still.

So many people come here to be themselves.
To fully realize their potential.
One after another it engulfs them.
Drains them.
Until their dreams are fleeting thoughts.
Memories of a once "great idea."
"Maybe one day," on repeat.

Don't let rent take you over.
Don't let happy hour make you sad.
Don't let those who are fearful instill it upon you.
Don't let your parents talk to to you about a 401k.

Allow your free time to be free.
Free to create.
Free to put your dreams on paper, on canvas, wherever you choose.
Choose art.
Always.

Throw away the key.

I'm looking back, but I can't see it anymore. It's blurry, it's smudged, and it's no longer the image I used to see. The images that I once thought were burned into my memory, the scars unwilling to fade. Suddenly I'm searching for the doors still open, but they are locked. Not just locked though, they are boarded up, caution tape wrapped around, not even a keyhole. I start to realize that maybe this is it. This is the letting go. The doors to my past are closed, windows to my darkness are filled with light. This is the beginning of something new. 

I didn't think I would be ready this quickly. What about the dwelling, contemplating, over thinking of it all? The coulda, shoulda, wouldas? There was none of it. The part of me that's part of you was left on the tarmac, and when the plane took off into the night and landed in the concrete jungle, something inside me shifted.

There's an openness about me now. Open to loving in a new way. A way that says " whatever you do is okay." Unconditional within some conditions. Chances will be taken, risks that risk going to far. Life's too short for anything less than doing what you want right now. Spending time with those who bring the best out in you, who raise you up, who make you smile, smile with your heart. 

If by some chance you give in to what is meant to be, and you believe that everything happens for a reason, then everyday will be a gift and a lesson. 

Cherish those who come into your life unexpectedly. They are the most important teachers you will meet.

Street Swag at NYFW